Hit Me

Have you ever had a day where magnitude of everything that you've gone through hits you like a ton of bricks? That's how today has been for me. Every name that I've ever been called, every time that I've been picked on, every time people have belittled me, all of the friends that I've lost, the unhealthy relationships, everything. I don't know what set all of these memories off but all I can do is sit here and let the tears roll down my face. I miss being able to go see my best guy friend have him take one look at me and give me a hug to make me feel better because that's all he knew how to do. I miss having those times with my best friend where I can sit there and cry and she won't judge me and nothing has to be said because she just understands. I hate days like today because I hate remembering.